Arroyo: I Need Computer Privileges to Access 9GAG

“All the former president asks is that she be given her God-given right to access 9GAG so that she can continue her work as a congresswoman. She also needs access to 4chan for delicate health reasons.”

(Manila) The camp of Pampanga Representative Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo came out late Monday with fresh claims that the former president is being subjected to mental torture because of the untoward conditions of her stay at the Veterans Memorial Medical Center (VMMC) in Quezon City.

“All the former president asks is that she be given her God-given right to access 9GAG so that she can continue her work as a congresswoman. She also needs access to 4chan for delicate health reasons.” the former president’s Deputy Spokesman Adam Bola told reporters.

Arroyo has been reportedly denied access to communication and media devices such as a television, her mobile phone or even a computer since her transfer to the VMMC from St. Luke’s Medical Center in Taguig. The former president was also prevented from attending Mass at the hospital’s chapel last Sunday.

Critics of the former president, on the other hand, claim that it should be enough to give the president access to the materials pertinent to her work as congresswoman.

“Just give her the briefs to the bills and information that is relevant to her work. She doesn’t need a computer. She doesn’t need 9GAG.”  Pangasinan Representative Manuel Dasol said.

However, other lawmakers disagree with Dasol on the subject of 9GAG.

“I think it’s an unspoken fact that most of our congressmen and senators consult 9GAG regularly to get inspiration for the laws they pass.” Zambales Representative Midas Manalaytay said.

Meanwhile, Arroyo’s spokesman also claims the former president is being treated worse than an inmate in regular jail after the Philippine National Police (PNP) announced it was banning visits to Arroyo on Mondays for room maintenance.

“It’s sad how the former president is being forced to stay in a small 150 square meter suite with only six rooms and several bathrooms. I’m sure the average jail inmate gets better treatment than this… otherwise I’d be making a really stupid statement in claiming that the former president is getting treated worse.” Bola said.