Informant Says GMA Will Try to Escape Country Disguised as an Ewok

Ewoks are a diminutive species of furry creatures indigenous to the forest moon of Endor. The average height of an adult Ewok is around one meter or three feet; roughly the same as the former president’s height.

(Manila) Rumors that former President Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo has intentions of leaving the country to seek political asylum abroad  continue to abound despite categorical denials from her camp that any such designs exist.

Artist's interpretation of Arroyo disguised as an Ewok. Arroyo is estimated to be roughly the same height as an adult Ewok.

Only this morning, another informant came forward with allegations that Arroyo will attempt to leave the country, despite being on the Bureau of Immigration (BI) watch list, by disguising herself as an Ewok.

Ewoks are a diminutive species of furry creatures indigenous to the forest moon of Endor. The average height of an adult Ewok is around one meter or three feet; roughly the same as the former president’s height.

“I heard them discussing what disguises Arroyo could use. Several options were presented by her technical working group but they ended up choosing the Ewok disguise because Arroyo thought she’d look adorable as one.” the anonymous source said.

The same informant claims that she overheard the discussion while she served refreshments to the group while they worked.

Among the other disguises from which Arroyo chose her disguise were: a Hobbit, Pikachu and Tyrion Lannister from George R.R. Martin’s ‘A Game of Thrones.’

Meanwhile, the DOJ has already passed the information along to the Bureau of Immigration so that airport personnel can be more vigilant when dealing with Ewoks leaving the country.

“We have instructed our people to watch out for Ewoks. We even told them to watch for Hobbits, Pokemons, and Lannisters.” BI Commissioner Victor Remillano said.

Ewok Ambassador to the Philippines Ploopie has already stated that the Ewok nation would never consider granting political asylum to Arroyo should she seek sanctuary on Endor.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s