(Manila) Almost a week after the president accepted the resignation of Philippine National Police Director General Alan Purisima, a source in Malacañang reports that candidates for the PNP chief’s replacement have been narrowed down to a “very short list.”
Among the top candidates identified by the source is the president’s own sister, talk show host and social media account unfollower, Kris Aquino.
“The president was obviously distraught about having to let go of General Purisima with whom he had personal ties,” the source said, “So he is choosing from a list of people who are also close to him.”
But being the president’s sister is far from being Aquino’s main qualification for the job of PNP chief according to the informant.
“She has honed a high proficiency in interrogation techniques through her experiences as host of ‘The Buzz,’ ‘Boy & Kris,’ ‘Kris TV,’ among other shows,” the informant told the Maligno Sentinel, “And celebrities are much, much, much better liars than criminals.”
Aquino also has a fair amount of knowledge about police procedure after having played major roles in movies such as ‘The Vizconde Massacre Story (God Help Us!)’ and ‘Humanda Ka Mayor! (Bahala na ang Diyos).’
The same informant, however, reported that “nothing has been decided yet.”
“There are still other candidates being considered… the president is also looking into a few patolas (luffa) because they are more traditional choices for top cops… but you can never can tell.”